My son says i’m “hot” and “fat”.

by Kevin on March 9, 2009

So, my three and a half year old son spent 4 days in the hospital a couple of weeks ago. We were very worried obviously, and i spent those nights beside his hospital bed in a roll-away cot. When he finally came home i allowed him to sleep in our bed for a few days, so he could be more closely monitored.
    We took turns sleeping with him…..the odd man out would sleep in the guest bedroom in order to get a good night’s rest.
    When asked if he wanted to sleep with me……my loving son replied, “no”. When asked, “why?”…..he replied that i was ” too hot”………when i asked him why i was “hot?”…..he said, “because your fat”!!!!!!!!!!!!
    So, according to my son……i’m “hot and fat.”
    Right then……all the times i had poked my dad’s stomach as a child and said that he had a pot-belly…….came back to haunt me. I can remember him saying to go ahead and laugh, but when i got to be forty…..i would have one, too. I’m forty.
     I spent this past weekend looking through catalogues at exercise equipment……on my computer, because i didn’t want the hassle of actually getting in the car and going to the sports equipment store.
     My son is now sleeping in his bed again. When he says he wants to sleep in my bed….i say, “no, you don’t. He says “why?” I say, because i’m “fat and hot!!!!”
     Children say the darndest things! We have laughed alot about this, and my dad has been laughing about it all the way over in Australia over the past few days.

      Do you have any funny stories? 

     Children are funny, and here is a video i found on youtube of a boy about my son’s age. He is hilarious……

{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }

Laura C March 9, 2009 at 1:19 pm

Hi Kev…..I luv that you write about your son. When my Luca was 3 he stared intently at the TV and said to me very solemnly…….”I’m gonna be on tv someday…….but right now – I just can’t fit inside there.” Kids are so delicious. I am convinced God made them that way so that we don’t kill them. 🙂 Luv you Kev.

Laura C March 9, 2009 at 6:19 am

Hi Kev…..I luv that you write about your son. When my Luca was 3 he stared intently at the TV and said to me very solemnly…….”I’m gonna be on tv someday…….but right now – I just can’t fit inside there.” Kids are so delicious. I am convinced God made them that way so that we don’t kill them. 🙂 Luv you Kev.

Kevin March 9, 2009 at 1:25 pm

HA! That is funny…..yes, my boy said something like that the other day. He was watching a tv show and it was scaring him….i told him that the ‘baddies” couldn’t get out of the tv…..and if they did…….Daddy would get them.
I don’t think he was convinced. Kevin

Kevin March 9, 2009 at 6:25 am

HA! That is funny…..yes, my boy said something like that the other day. He was watching a tv show and it was scaring him….i told him that the ‘baddies” couldn’t get out of the tv…..and if they did…….Daddy would get them.
I don’t think he was convinced. Kevin

Malene Klejs March 10, 2009 at 10:42 am

You know what? You are surely hot, but you are NOT fat!! I’ve seen you very very close, and you are one of the fittest 40 yrs old men I’ve ever seen. But anyhow..if Beau thinks so, it’s true, right? And kids DO say the weirdest thing.I have three of them and when they were younger I laughed and wondering every day.I’m so praised to be a parent!!

Malene Klejs March 10, 2009 at 3:42 am

You know what? You are surely hot, but you are NOT fat!! I’ve seen you very very close, and you are one of the fittest 40 yrs old men I’ve ever seen. But anyhow..if Beau thinks so, it’s true, right? And kids DO say the weirdest thing.I have three of them and when they were younger I laughed and wondering every day.I’m so praised to be a parent!!

Malene Klejs March 10, 2009 at 10:47 am

Oh..I do have a story from yesterday. An old friend was visited me and she brought her 4 yr old daughter,. The daughter, Victoria, haven’t seen me before so i wanted to get to know her a little better. We were playing with her babydolls, when she suddenly drop a doll on the floor. I said: “Oh,,hope the baby didn’t get hurt?”..and then the 4 yr old starred at me like I was nuts and said: “No..it’s just a doll. It can’t feel anything…don’t you know that?”….hahaha…

Malene Klejs March 10, 2009 at 3:47 am

Oh..I do have a story from yesterday. An old friend was visited me and she brought her 4 yr old daughter,. The daughter, Victoria, haven’t seen me before so i wanted to get to know her a little better. We were playing with her babydolls, when she suddenly drop a doll on the floor. I said: “Oh,,hope the baby didn’t get hurt?”..and then the 4 yr old starred at me like I was nuts and said: “No..it’s just a doll. It can’t feel anything…don’t you know that?”….hahaha…

Botan Styles March 10, 2009 at 1:08 pm

Howdy Kevin,it’s good to read your son is alright..it’s been almost a year since I txted you…I will have a myspace page setup very soon with some video and music.Man 50 day’s 50 state’s ouch my friend,it doesn’t help the voice to be so busy eh?I send prayer’s and all thing’s good!! I’ll be around soon on the net” Your comrad in music-Ole Bo-Peace.

Botan Styles March 10, 2009 at 6:08 am

Howdy Kevin,it’s good to read your son is alright..it’s been almost a year since I txted you…I will have a myspace page setup very soon with some video and music.Man 50 day’s 50 state’s ouch my friend,it doesn’t help the voice to be so busy eh?I send prayer’s and all thing’s good!! I’ll be around soon on the net” Your comrad in music-Ole Bo-Peace.

Melissa March 10, 2009 at 3:28 pm

this reminded me of the cute things my kids say. And for a whileIwrote the newsletter for church in Lebanon andIused to include a section about the things the kids would tell me about their parents like that they played the playstation all the time andit makes mommy mad.
the funniest was my daughter,the GPS was giving incorrect directions to Wal-mart and I just turned it off.but she got mad at it and said,”you need to just shut-up and listen to God.” lol! then when we got to Wal-mart I said ” it smells like garlic, here.”another daughter said, ” oh, that’s probably comming from granny’s house.” then my other daughter said “no it’snot. I’s comming from Hollywood.” the other daughter responds “yeah, it
s probably California.”{They always say really cute things. I encourage them to share outrageous opinions before telling the the truth. interesting how they “figuring everything out.”

Melissa March 10, 2009 at 8:28 am

this reminded me of the cute things my kids say. And for a whileIwrote the newsletter for church in Lebanon andIused to include a section about the things the kids would tell me about their parents like that they played the playstation all the time andit makes mommy mad.
the funniest was my daughter,the GPS was giving incorrect directions to Wal-mart and I just turned it off.but she got mad at it and said,”you need to just shut-up and listen to God.” lol! then when we got to Wal-mart I said ” it smells like garlic, here.”another daughter said, ” oh, that’s probably comming from granny’s house.” then my other daughter said “no it’snot. I’s comming from Hollywood.” the other daughter responds “yeah, it
s probably California.”{They always say really cute things. I encourage them to share outrageous opinions before telling the the truth. interesting how they “figuring everything out.”

Gary Jenkins March 13, 2009 at 4:48 pm

Funny stuff. Kid’s never cease to amaze.

Gary Jenkins March 13, 2009 at 9:48 am

Funny stuff. Kid’s never cease to amaze.

Val Marshall March 22, 2009 at 6:42 pm

Oh dear ..”out of the mouths of babes” eh? Wait ’til you’re out on the High Street with him and this little ( but loud!) voice pipes up with “Daddy , why is that Policeman/ mugger with a knife / lady / man etc so FAT ??” at which point the street always seems to be strangely silent …. AARGH!!

Val Marshall March 22, 2009 at 11:42 am

Oh dear ..”out of the mouths of babes” eh? Wait ’til you’re out on the High Street with him and this little ( but loud!) voice pipes up with “Daddy , why is that Policeman/ mugger with a knife / lady / man etc so FAT ??” at which point the street always seems to be strangely silent …. AARGH!!

Karen March 27, 2009 at 4:12 am

So I am babysitting for my Grandson Willie and I am trying to get him to take a nap. He is not cooperating and he starts to tap me on the rear end. I say to him “why you keep hitting me there? Am I that fat?” He says to me “Grandma you are not fat, you are just old”. I say back to him “well then is Grandpa Don old, or Aunt Sara, or Uncle Chad?” He says “No, just you are”. Talk about a reality check.
Oh well, sometimes the truth hurts.

Karen March 26, 2009 at 9:12 pm

So I am babysitting for my Grandson Willie and I am trying to get him to take a nap. He is not cooperating and he starts to tap me on the rear end. I say to him “why you keep hitting me there? Am I that fat?” He says to me “Grandma you are not fat, you are just old”. I say back to him “well then is Grandpa Don old, or Aunt Sara, or Uncle Chad?” He says “No, just you are”. Talk about a reality check.
Oh well, sometimes the truth hurts.

Deacon Eddie April 3, 2009 at 10:50 am

I love u , man.

Deacon Eddie April 3, 2009 at 3:50 am

I love u , man.

Kevin April 3, 2009 at 8:32 pm

Val, that is funny! Kids are brutally honest.
Karen, you are not old!
Eddie, I love you, too…….not in the Key West way though. Smile.
Kevin

Kevin April 3, 2009 at 1:32 pm

Val, that is funny! Kids are brutally honest.
Karen, you are not old!
Eddie, I love you, too…….not in the Key West way though. Smile.
Kevin

Carol Tedesco May 19, 2009 at 9:10 pm

My niece when she was about three, when told by one of her grandmothers friends that she looked like she had grown another foot, looked down with great relief at her feet to discover only two! 🙂 No words necessary! 🙂 They are so literal at that age!

Carol Tedesco May 19, 2009 at 2:10 pm

My niece when she was about three, when told by one of her grandmothers friends that she looked like she had grown another foot, looked down with great relief at her feet to discover only two! 🙂 No words necessary! 🙂 They are so literal at that age!

Abby read x August 9, 2009 at 5:32 am

my 6 year old cuz taryn has a new bike and she loved riding out by her house init and her dad told her if she rides on the road he will take the bike of her.then a few days after my mum caught her on the road then my mum was watching her for a bit then went out to her because we only live cross the oad from her and my mum goes taryn get of the road because them cars come flying round her then my mum told her of then my goes stay of the road or ill take the bike of you like your dad said.my mum told her of . and taryn goes i dont come here to answer them kind of queastions do i Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha……

janetemmagarbe November 22, 2009 at 11:42 am

Once, in a fast food restaurtant, my niece came back from the restroom with her older cousin and rejoined us at the table. A woman, returning to her table from a restroom stop, walked past us. Bethie piped up “That lady is FAT”. “Oh, Beth, replied her mother, that is not a very nice thing to say about someone.” “Well, she didn't seem to mind when I told her in the bathroom”, replied Bethie.

Kids are like SUPER honest. You've got to LOVE it.

kevinmontgomery November 25, 2009 at 1:09 pm

That is funny!!!!!! Kevin

kevinmontgomery November 25, 2009 at 9:09 pm

That is funny!!!!!! Kevin

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